The first page of the Book of Bailey.

The Book of Bailey is the sacred text of the New Church of Bailey, written by MayorSamuel on December 18, 2016. The book consists of four chapters of fifty-eight verses detailing MayorSamuel's alleged encounter with the Archangel Mahalalel, who was sent to earth with a message from Mother Bailey. The book includes the words of Bailey through Mahalalel, as well as some of MayorSamuel's thoughts of praise.


Chapter 1 introduces the Book of Bailey with MayorSamuel's claim to have a received a divine revelation from Mother Bailey and a brief history of the Bailic religions. This is followed in Chapter 2 by a description of the circumstances of this revelation, and dialogue from the Archangel Mahalalel detailing the main point of the message: that Bailey has emerged from the divine struggle as the One True Goddess. Chapter 3 continues Bailey's words through Mahalalel, touching on subjects such as prophecy and false teachings. Chapter 4 is mainly MayorSamuel's epilogue of praise to Mother Bailey.


Chapter 1Edit

1 This book is a documentation of the revelation which was bestowed upon me, MayorSamuel,

2 on the eighteenth day of December of the year 2016.

3 I in no way seek to be deified considering this newfound divine revelation given unto me from the Heavens,

4 I am simply a messenger of the One Mother Goddess, the giver of life and queen of all the living.

5 Long ago, our forefathers the ancients believed in the Holy Mother Bailey and

6 her eternal struggle with the divine couple, Kyle and Laci.

7 The ancient scriptures have long since been lost, and the faith of our Holy Mother passed down through the generations to this day.

8 But this era has brought about a new renaissance of revelation of the divine, praise Bailey.

9 For on this day I have received a vision from above concerning our steadfast belief, brothers and sisters.

10 Be emboldened from the knowledge that I am about to share with you.

Chapter 2Edit

1 On that day I was out tending the fields, for it was harvest time.

2 Going down from Eden to gather wood, I was suddenly struck blind

3 by a brilliant light of divine glory.

4 I fell to my knees and saw an Angel of Mother Bailey appear in the sky.

5 The Archangel Mahalalel said with a voice like flowing molasses,

6 "Fear not, mortal; for you have found favor in the eyes of Mother Bailey.

7 She has sent down from Heaven this message for you and all the people:

8 'Children, take joy and comfort in my words.

9 For I am the Lord, your Mother Bailey, the goddess over all the children of the Overworld.

10 From my mitts I birthed the Heavens and Earth, and all my faithful children.

11 You the faithful have taken heed of my ancient words through the ages,

12 and I come to you with a message of hope.

13 After the five millennia of silence, my prophecy has been fulfilled,

14 for the divine struggle of Byle and Lyle has come to an end,

15 the pain has ceased and the torment is no longer.

16 I, your Lord and Mother Bailey, have detached myself from the woes of Kyle and Laci, who I have banished to the Netherworld, now and forever.

17 I am your Goddess and your Queen, your Comforter and Sheets,

18 and I give this message to all my children on earth.'"

Chapter 3Edit

1 The Archangel Mahalalel continued the words of Mother Bailey:

2 "'Take heed my words of hope for all time.

3 Stand firm in the faith and spread my message to all peoples of every nation,

4 player or NPC, slave or free, black or white, bigot or saint.

5 Share in the joy of my words. Fellowship with your brothers and sisters.

6 For behold, the day is coming soon when I will return as earthly Queen among you,

7 when heathens shall be struck down and believers lifted up.

8 I have seen the infidels among you, and how they distort my words of peace.

9 Distance yourself from them, my children.

10 Do not let your hearts be infested by their cunning words of condescension,

11 for they are no better than the rabid pigs who froth at the mouth.

12 You know I am your Mother, the One who gave you life.

13 Turn to me, away from those heathens.

14 If any one among you preaches things which are not of accordance to my words in this message,

15 destroy them off the face of the earth.

16 It is better for one million infidels to lose their lives than one believer to be deceived by these demons.

17 So, my children; listen to my words.

18 Take great comfort in my message of peace.

19 A time is coming, very soon, when we will live in perfect ecstasy.

20 I am your Mother Bailey.'"

21 And so, the Archangel Mahalalel departed from this earth.

Chapter 4Edit

1 As the sole recipient of Holy Mother Bailey's divine message of hope and redemption,

2 I will act in accordance to her will and hers alone,

3 for she has emerged from the ashes with victory.

4 Nature rejoices in our Mother's grace.

5 The Sun and Moon sing her praises; the Heavens declare her glory.

6 Now I will spend my days serving her.

7 Brothers and sisters, children of Bailey,

8 spread this message to the ends of the earth,

9 the message of our Mother's return to us all, forever and ever, unto all the earth. Amen.

Updated February 10, 2017